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Thursday, June 5, 2014

Graduations, Transitions and Life Lessons!

We're celebrating with our sweet niece!



Graduating from High School... the world just waiting to be explored!  Such promise!  Such joy!

Life is chock full of transitions... and they start early!  I can remember the excitement of "graduating" kindergarten.  Not because of any great academic goals, but because 1st graders could get off the rocks of the playground and run out in the grass.  I'm sure I was properly appreciative of my ABC's and 123's, but, oh my, just giddy at the freedom 1st grade brought!

And then there was the kid's table in the kitchen at Grandma Meiers.  How we grandkids longed to eat at the "Big" table with all the grown-ups.  It was a promotion of huge proportions to move up to the elegantly appointed dining room and eat on real china!  We laugh now at our misplaced aspirations!  Once we "arrived" we found out that grown-up conversations and the requisite fine manners really put a damper on having fun at the dinner table!  I'd go back to the "kitchen table" shenanigans in a heartbeat...

And so it goes, transition begats growth.  But not all transitions bring such excitement, nor anticipation.  Transitioning from healthy to sick, from traveling the world to tackling cancer treatments, from planning retirement hobbies to bravely discussing end of life preferences... these are the kinds of transitions no one wants to face.  These transitions stretch us to grow in ways we never imagined.

In the midst of all the graduation festivities, one speech touched a chord for me... wise words spoken to not just the young, promising graduates of 2014, but to each one of us struggling with the hard transitions of this life.  Might you take a moment and be encouraged?
 
The Commencement Speech was given by Navy SEAL Admiral McRaven when he returned to his alma mater at the University of Texas at Austin.  He shares 10 Life Lessons he learned from his basic SEAL training.  It is a powerful reminder that we will all face transitions and adversity as we journey through life.  And whether it's facing racial injustice, fighting for that dream job or confronting a terminal diagnosis, it is how we face these challenges that determines the outcome and brings God-honoring growth.


And here's the abbreviated transcript from the above video:
 
"The University’s slogan is, 'What starts here changes the world.'

I have to admit—I kinda like it.
'What starts here changes the world.'

Tonight there are almost 8,000 students graduating from UT. That great paragon of analytical rigor, Ask.Com says that the average American will meet 10,000 people in their lifetime.

That’s a lot of folks.

But, if every one of you changed the lives of just ten people—and each one of those folks changed the lives of another ten people—just ten—then in five generations—125 years—the class of 2014 will have changed the lives of 800 million people.

800 million people—think of it—over twice the population of the United States. Go one more generation and you can change the entire population of the world—8 billion people.

If you think it’s hard to change the lives of ten people—change their lives forever—you’re wrong.
I saw it happen every day in Iraq and Afghanistan.

A young Army officer makes a decision to go left instead of right down a road in Baghdad and the ten soldiers in his squad are saved from close-in ambush.

In Kandahar province, Afghanistan, a non-commissioned officer from the Female Engagement Team senses something isn’t right and directs the infantry platoon away from a 500 pound IED, saving the lives of a dozen soldiers.

But, if you think about it, not only were these soldiers saved by the decisions of one person, but their children yet unborn—were also saved. And their children’s children—were saved.  Generations were saved by one decision—by one person.

But changing the world can happen anywhere and anyone can do it.

So, what starts here can indeed change the world, but the question is… what will the world look like after you change it?

Well, I am confident that it will look much, much better, but if you will humor this old sailor for just a moment, I have a few suggestions that may help you on your way to a better a world. And while these lessons were learned during my time in the military, I can assure you that it matters not whether you ever served a day in uniform.  It matters not your gender, your ethnic or religious background, your orientation, or your social status.

Our struggles in this world are similar and the lessons to overcome those struggles and to move forward—changing ourselves and the world around us—will apply equally to all.

I have been a Navy SEAL for 36 years. But it all began when I left UT for Basic SEAL training in Coronado, California.

Basic SEAL training is six months of long torturous runs in the soft sand, midnight swims in the cold water off San Diego, obstacles courses, unending calisthenics, days without sleep and always being cold, wet and miserable. It is six months of being constantly harassed by professionally trained warriors who seek to find the weak of mind and body and eliminate them from ever becoming a Navy SEAL.

But, the training also seeks to find those students who can lead in an environment of constant stress, chaos, failure and hardships.

To me basic SEAL training was a life time of challenges crammed into six months.

So, here are the ten lessons I learned from basic SEAL training that hopefully will be of value to you as you move forward in life.

Every morning in basic SEAL training, my instructors, who at the time were all Vietnam veterans, would show up in my barracks room and the first thing they would inspect was your bed.

If you did it right, the corners would be square, the covers pulled tight, the pillow centered just under the headboard and the extra blanket folded neatly at the foot of the rack—rack—that’s Navy talk for bed.
It was a simple task—mundane at best. But every morning we were required to make our bed to perfection.

It seemed a little ridiculous at the time, particularly in light of the fact that were aspiring to be real warriors, tough battle hardened SEALs—but the wisdom of this simple act has been proven to me many times over.

If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another.

By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter.

If you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right.

And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made—that you made—and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.

#1. If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.

During SEAL training the students are broken down into boat crews. Each crew is seven students—three on each side of a small rubber boat and one coxswain to help guide the dingy.

Every day your boat crew forms up on the beach and is instructed to get through the surf zone and paddle several miles down the coast.

In the winter, the surf off San Diego can get to be 8 to 10 feet high and it is exceedingly difficult to paddle through the plunging surf unless everyone digs in. Every paddle must be synchronized to the stroke count of the coxswain. Everyone must exert equal effort or the boat will turn against the wave and be unceremoniously tossed back on the beach.

For the boat to make it to its destination, everyone must paddle.

You can’t change the world alone—you will need some help— and to truly get from your starting point to your destination takes friends, colleagues, the good will of strangers and a strong coxswain to guide them.

#2. If you want to change the world, find someone to help you paddle.

Over a few weeks of difficult training my SEAL class which started with 150 men was down to just 35. There were now six boat crews of seven men each.

I was in the boat with the tall guys, but the best boat crew we had was made up of the the little guys—the munchkin crew we called them—no one was over about 5-foot five.

The munchkin boat crew had one American Indian, one African American, one Polish American, one Greek American, one Italian American, and two tough kids from the mid-west. They out paddled, out-ran, and out swam all the other boat crews.

The big men in the other boat crews would always make good natured fun of the tiny little flippers the munchkins put on their tiny little feet prior to every swim.

But somehow these little guys, from every corner of the Nation and the world, always had the last laugh— swimming faster than everyone and reaching the shore long before the rest of us.

SEAL training was a great equalizer. Nothing mattered but your will to succeed. Not your color, not your ethnic background, not your education and not your social status.

#3. If you want to change the world, measure a person by the size of their heart, not the size of their flippers.

Several times a week, the instructors would line up the class and do a uniform inspection. It was exceptionally thorough. Your hat had to be perfectly starched, your uniform immaculately pressed and your belt buckle shiny and void of any smudges.

But it seemed that no matter how much effort you put into starching your hat, or pressing your uniform or polishing your belt buckle—- it just wasn’t good enough.

The instructors would find “something” wrong.

For failing the uniform inspection, the student had to run, fully clothed into the surfzone and then, wet from head to toe, roll around on the beach until every part of your body was covered with sand. The effect was known as a “sugar cookie.” You stayed in that uniform the rest of the day—cold, wet and sandy.

There were many a student who just couldn’t accept the fact that all their effort was in vain. That no matter how hard they tried to get the uniform right—it was unappreciated.

Those students didn’t make it through training.

Those students didn’t understand the purpose of the drill. You were never going to succeed. You were never going to have a perfect uniform.

Sometimes no matter how well you prepare or how well you perform you still end up as a sugar cookie.
It’s just the way life is sometimes.

#4. If you want to change the world get over being a sugar cookie and keep moving forward.

Every day during training you were challenged with multiple physical events—long runs, long swims, obstacle courses, hours of calisthenics—something designed to test your mettle.

Every event had standards—times you had to meet. If you failed to meet those standards your name was posted on a list and at the end of the day those on the list were invited to—a “circus.”

A circus was two hours of additional calisthenics—designed to wear you down, to break your spirit, to force you to quit.

No one wanted a circus.

A circus meant that for that day you didn’t measure up. A circus meant more fatigue—and more fatigue meant that the following day would be more difficult—and more circuses were likely.

But at some time during SEAL training, everyone—everyone—made the circus list.

But an interesting thing happened to those who were constantly on the list. Over time those students-—who did two hours of extra calisthenics—got stronger and stronger. The pain of the circuses built inner strength-built physical resiliency.

Life is filled with circuses.

You will fail. You will likely fail often. It will be painful. It will be discouraging. At times it will test you to your very core.

#5. But if you want to change the world, don’t be afraid of the circuses.

At least twice a week, the trainees were required to run the obstacle course. The obstacle course contained 25 obstacles including a 10-foot high wall, a 30-foot cargo net, and a barbed wire crawl to name a few.
But the most challenging obstacle was the slide for life. It had a three level 30 foot tower at one end and a one level tower at the other. In between was a 200-foot long rope.

You had to climb the three tiered tower and once at the top, you grabbed the rope, swung underneath the rope and pulled yourself hand over hand until you got to the other end.

The record for the obstacle course had stood for years when my class began training in 1977.

The record seemed unbeatable, until one day, a student decided to go down the slide for life—head first.
Instead of swinging his body underneath the rope and inching his way down, he bravely mounted the TOP of the rope and thrust himself forward. It was a dangerous move—seemingly foolish, and fraught with risk.

Failure could mean injury and being dropped from the training.

Without hesitation—the student slid down the rope—perilously fast, instead of several minutes, it only took him half that time and by the end of the course he had broken the record.

#6. If you want to change the world sometimes you have to slide down the obstacle head first.

During the land warfare phase of training, the students are flown out to San Clemente Island which lies off the coast of San Diego. The waters off San Clemente are a breeding ground for the great white sharks.

To pass SEAL training there are a series of long swims that must be completed. One—is the night swim.

Before the swim the instructors joyfully brief the trainees on all the species of sharks that inhabit the waters off San Clemente. They assure you, however, that no student has ever been eaten by a shark—at least not recently.

But, you are also taught that if a shark begins to circle your position—stand your ground. Do not swim away. Do not act afraid.

And if the shark, hungry for a midnight snack, darts towards you—then summons up all your strength and punch him in the snout and he will turn and swim away.

There are a lot of sharks in the world. If you hope to complete the swim you will have to deal with them.

#7. So, if you want to change the world, don’t back down from the sharks.

As Navy SEALs one of our jobs is to conduct underwater attacks against enemy shipping. We practiced this technique extensively during basic training.

The ship attack mission is where a pair of SEAL divers is dropped off outside an enemy harbor and then swims well over two miles—underwater—using nothing but a depth gauge and a compass to get to their target.

During the entire swim, even well below the surface there is some light that comes through. It is comforting to know that there is open water above you. But as you approach the ship, which is tied to a pier, the light begins to fade. The steel structure of the ship blocks the moonlight—it blocks the surrounding street lamps—it blocks all ambient light.

To be successful in your mission, you have to swim under the ship and find the keel—the center line and the deepest part of the ship.

This is your objective. But the keel is also the darkest part of the ship—where you cannot see your hand in front of your face, where the noise from the ship’s machinery is deafening and where it is easy to get disoriented and fail.

Every SEAL knows that under the keel, at the darkest moment of the mission—is the time when you must be calm, composed—when all your tactical skills, your physical power and all your inner strength must be brought to bear.

#8. If you want to change the world, you must be your very best in the darkest moment.

The ninth week of training is referred to as “Hell Week.” It is six days of no sleep, constant physical and mental harassment and—one special day at the Mud Flats—the Mud Flats are an area between San Diego and Tijuana where the water runs off and creates the Tijuana slue’s—a swampy patch of terrain where the mud will engulf you.

It is on Wednesday of Hell Week that you paddle down to the mud flats and spend the next 15 hours trying to survive the freezing cold mud, the howling wind and the incessant pressure to quit from the instructors.
As the sun began to set that Wednesday evening, my training class, having committed some “egregious infraction of the rules” was ordered into the mud.

The mud consumed each man till there was nothing visible but our heads. The instructors told us we could leave the mud if only five men would quit—just five men and we could get out of the oppressive cold.
Looking around the mud flat it was apparent that some students were about to give up. It was still over eight hours till the sun came up—eight more hours of bone chilling cold.

The chattering teeth and shivering moans of the trainees were so loud it was hard to hear anything and then, one voice began to echo through the night—one voice raised in song.

The song was terribly out of tune, but sung with great enthusiasm.

One voice became two and two became three and before long everyone in the class was singing.

We knew that if one man could rise above the misery then others could as well.

The instructors threatened us with more time in the mud if we kept up the singing—but the singing persisted.
And somehow—the mud seemed a little warmer, the wind a little tamer and the dawn not so far away.

If I have learned anything in my time traveling the world, it is the power of hope. The power of one person—Washington, Lincoln, King, Mandela and even a young girl from Pakistan—Malala—one person can change the world by giving people hope.

#9. So, if you want to change the world, start singing when you’re up to your neck in mud.

Finally, in SEAL training there is a bell. A brass bell that hangs in the center of the compound for all the students to see.

All you have to do to quit—is ring the bell. Ring the bell and you no longer have to wake up at 5 o’clock.

Ring the bell and you no longer have to do the freezing cold swims.

Ring the bell and you no longer have to do the runs, the obstacle course, the PT—and you no longer have to endure the hardships of training.

Just ring the bell.

#10. If you want to change the world don’t ever, ever ring the bell.

To the graduating class of 2014, you are moments away from graduating. Moments away from beginning your journey through life. Moments away from starting to change the world—for the better.

It will not be easy.

But, YOU are the class of 2014—the class that can affect the lives of 800 million people in the next century.

Start each day with a task completed.

Find someone to help you through life.

Respect everyone.

Know that life is not fair and that you will fail often, but if you take take some risks, step up when the times are toughest, face down the bullies, lift up the downtrodden and never, ever give up—if you do these things, then the next generation and the generations that follow will live in a world far better than the one we have today and—what started here will indeed have changed the world—for the better."


May you each be graced to find God's very best for you in the darkest moments of this life.  And don't ever, ever ring the bell!

Congratulations to the Graduates of 2014!
 My Love to each, Jane

Friday, May 30, 2014

Sometimes it's Hard...

... but mostly it's Good!  Friendship... 

I was reminded again this week past what a treasure our friends are.  It was our annual camping trip extraordinaire!  With friends.  5 days.  Fun.  Fellowship.  Delightful Grace Break!

 
Some of my favorite people...
22 years of together, ups and downs, smiles and "frowns",
woven into one big beautiful family.
 
Y.U.C. stands for "You Ugly Camping" - don't ask, long story :-)
but we wouldn't trade a minute of this journey together...
 
 
 


 
 
 
 
 


 
 
 
 
 
 
 


 
 
 
 


 


 
 
 
 


 
 
 
 
The work of friendship in our lives is an undeniable labor of love.  To have kindred spirits who understand your joy and your grief... who get your kind of funny... who welcome you into their messy, crazy lives...
 
that's the love that keeps us going through the valleys,
that puts the smile in our hearts.
 
Praying your weekend finds you all knee-deep in joyful fellowship with one of God's sweetest gifts...
 
Friends!
 

Monday, May 26, 2014

Honoring the Brave...

Today the flags were flying down Dad's street.

 


 
A beautifully poignant reminder of today's solemn celebration.  As the flag flies free in the warm breeze we have only to look to the brave men and women of our armed services to thank, for freedom is never really free...
 
 
 
Graced with Gratitude this day...
 
 

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Promising Clinical Trial for Pancreatic Cancer...

Hope for a Cure... That's what clinical trials are all about.

If you haven't seen the news on MM-398 here's a sneak peak...a letter from Julie Fleshman posted on the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network this past week:

I am pleased to share some good news for the pancreatic cancer community. Today, Merrimack Pharmaceuticals, Inc., announced the positive results from its NAPOLI-1 phase III clinical trial. The study involved three participant groups, each made up of patients with metastatic pancreatic cancer who had been previously treated with gemcitabine (Gemzar®) -based chemotherapy.

Patients were treated with either Merrimack’s drug MM-398 (irinotecan liposome injection), the chemotherapy drug 5-FU and leucovorin (a standard treatment option) or a combination of MM-398 with 5-FU and leucovorin.

This study showed that a combination of MM-398 with 5-FU and leucovorin increased overall survival by nearly two months (6.1 vs. 4.2) compared to those patients treated with 5-FU and leucovorin alone. This represents the median, meaning some patients experienced longer survival, and some shorter. A statistically significant increase in progression-free survival was also observed in this group.

The patient group treated with MM-398 alone had similar results to the group treated with only 5-FU and leucovorin.

We are encouraged by the results of this trial. New developments will eventually lead to greater treatment advances. Last year, Abraxane®, in combination with gemcitabine, proved effective in treating newly diagnosed patients. Now, MM-398 is poised to help those who seek additional options after their initial treatments for metastatic pancreatic cancer. Two new medications in 18 months is a clear sign of the momentum we are gaining in the fight against pancreatic cancer.

Merrimack plans to submit MM-398, to be used in combination with 5-FU and leucovorin, by the end of 2014 for approval by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). MM-398 is not currently available to patients. We will share more news as we learn of it.

The 417 patients who enrolled in this trial have helped change treatment options for this disease and created a legacy of progress for those yet to be diagnosed. To learn more about pancreatic cancer clinical trials or have a personalized search performed for you or a loved one, please contact our Patient and Liaison Services (PALS) program. We maintain the nation’s most comprehensive pancreatic cancer clinical trials database and do not charge a fee for any of our services. PALS Associates are available at 877-272-6226 and pals@pancan.org, Monday – Friday, 7 a.m. – 5 p.m., PT.

With hope,

Julie Fleshman
Julie Fleshman, JD, MBA
President and CEO

No, it's not a cure... yet!  But praying with Hope for treatment advancements for all going through the pancreatic cancer journey.

My Love,
               Jane

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Flowers for Mom


 
A day of remembering...
 
 
 
...of grieving still...
 
 
 
... of missing that forever smile...
 
 
 
A day of Sweet Gratitude for the love she lavished on us all...
 
Happy Mother's Day Mom
 
Missing you every single day,
Loving you Always and Forever,
 
     Jane
 

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Life Lessons


For your weekend, dear friends... a favorite reprint from Regina Brett, The Plain Dealer.

Here is one of her most-requested columns... the 45 Lessons Life Taught Me and 5 to Grow On

1.  Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2.  When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3.  Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. 
4.  Don't take yourself so seriously.  No one else does.
5.  Pay off your credit cards every month.
6.  You don't have to win every argument.  Agree to disagree.
7.  Cry with someone.  It's more healing than crying alone.
8.  It's OK to get angry with God.  He can take it.
9.  Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry. 
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of any eye.  But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties.  Get busy living, or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes.  If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood.  But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie.  Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now.  Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything.  Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick.  Your friends will.  Stay in touch.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.  Make it memorable.
38. Read the Psalms.  They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day.  Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life.  Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved. 
44. Envy is a waste of time.  You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath.  It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

It's All Grace!
Much Love,
            Jane


Saturday, May 3, 2014

Garden Gates Beckon...








 



 
 
 


 


 


 

























A visit to Clark Gardens in Weatherford, Texas to welcome Spring!
 
May your weekend be filled with just such beauty and peace...
Praying you find Garden Gates of wonder to walk right through,
 wherever you might be.
 
In Grace Bowing Thanks,
                       Jane