Praising God in the Storm

 

A Step of Faith...

Did you know that before Memorial Day was a day of remembering, there was another day, a way of honoring our fallen called Decoration Day?

The origins of our Memorial Day tradition only make the honoring more poignant...

Decoration Day began in the years following the Civil War which ended in the spring of 1865.  The death toll was unimaginable... claiming more lives than any conflict in United States history.  Families were torn apart.  The divide between the North and South a wound that ran deep.

As the war came to a close, Congress established the national cemetery system to lay our fallen soldiers to rest, both Union and Confederate.

In the years following the Civil War, people began holding rituals in the spring to lay flowers and pray over the graves in tribute to the many, many fallen soldiers.  Thus, Decoration Day became a way to remember the service of the brave and loved.

In 1868, General John A. Logan set aside the 30th of May "for the purpose of strewing with flowers, or otherwise decorating the graves of comrades who died in defense of their country during the late rebellion, and whose bodies now lie in almost every city, village and hamlet churchyard in the land."

Can you imagine the pain and visceral grief those families experienced as they laid flowers at the graves of husbands, sons, friends... and enemies... for the Union and Confederate soldiers often lay side by side in the cemeteries as nearby fields still bore the scars of the too recent battles, soaked in the blood that nearly tore our country in two.

It was a monumental step of faith to ask the people to decorate all the graves.  For the loved and for the enemy.

Some were brothers... Some were strangers.

But for the sake of unity.  For the enduring of a nation... the memorials were laid for all who fought.

It humbles me to think of the strength it took for those families to lay aside their deep hurt and choose to honor all the fallen.

Those steps of faith walk us through history.  Decoration Day became Memorial Day soon after World War I when as a nation we honored all our fallen, both those here and those on foreign soil.

And that faith can be a model to each of us.  When we choose to set aside our differences, our pain, our heartbreak and walk out love right where we are.  And not just this Memorial Day... it is a way of living life well and gifting Grace far and wide.

"We ought always to thank God for you,

brothers and sisters, and rightly so,

because your faith is growing more and more,

and the love all of you have for one another is increasing.

Therefore, among God's churches we boast about

your perseverance and faith

in all the persecutions and trials

you are enduring."

                           II Thess 1:3.4

Faith in who we are and whose we are... this Memorial Day I am reminded that the most holy of Love comes from a God who did not neglect to share it with us through the gift and sacrifice of Christ.

For surely, in Christ that love overflowed and covered this unworthy heart with an unmerited tenderness.  And it is in Christ that faith finds a foothold and the strength to persevere during the storms and sufferings of this life...

... giving us the strength to decorate the grave of our enemy and move forward in faith as forgiveness frees our wounded souls.

Graced to Remember this day,
In Love, Always,
Jane

A Daring Goal...

Faith is the daring of the soul to go farther than it can see.

                         ~ Anonymous

Today might be a Great Day...

 trust me...

It might be the day to start something New...

or

The day to start the something you've been Putting Off.

Your present circumstances don't determine where you can go;

they merely determine where you start.  ~ Nido Qubein

No matter what happened yesterday or last week or a year past...

No matter what your present circumstances are,

Today is a Great Day for New Starts!

Sunday Speaks... Words of Faith

A Springboard to Confidence

Getting ready to jump into a new year...

Mostly excited for a fresh start, yes?

But, sometimes...

there's a bit of fear facing the unknown.

Praying for strength and confidence to open the door to 2019...

Lord, Give us Faith like Daniel for all you've called us to walk through!

"So, give me faith like Daniel in the lion's den,

Give me hope like Moses in the wilderness;

Give me a heart like David, Lord be my defense,

So I can face my giants with confidence!"

                ~ Sanctus Real

When God Doesn't Answer Our Prayers...

In the midst of family hugs and baby kisses...

 

Our week-long visit with our Illinois kin went much too fast!

 

And right in between games of Rummikub and Springtime Grilling...

 

 

 

 

Sacred conversations mingled low and hushed.

 

Grandpa Don, family patriarch, giver of peppermint candies and piggy-back rides, Sunday morning bus runs and fish stories, has been grappling with the hard things.  The questions of faith and prayers and the promises of God...

 

Over quiet morning cups of coffee and afternoon strolls down sterile corridors... the struggles emerged.  This journey thru life weighing heavy.   Diabetes and prostate cancer can ravage a body.  And this man of faith prays hard for healing, for the pain to ease, for comfort...

 

For with God all things are possible... Yes?   He told us to Ask and it shall be Given... True.  We nod.  It is a promise we hold fast...  and yet he shakes his head in defeat... then why has He not answered my prayers?   In a fit of frustration, Don gestures to a body betraying him, tired legs that refuse him the independence of walking free, burning lungs starved for the oxygen whistling thru the infernal plastic tubes and brittle bones aching long into the night.  Why has the God I have served, and believed in and trusted with my very life, turned a deaf ear to my cries?

 

We listen to his heart.

 

Cry deep inside for the pain we know he feels, the loss we feel as he ages before our eyes.

 

And we search the Word for life, for hope... for Grace in the midst of the hurt.

 

We pray.  Yes, even still.  Pray for faith to grow, for answers, for peace...

 

And God is there.  In the most unlikely of places.  In a nursing home, filled with the frail and dying.  A minister dares to speak scripture that made us cringe...

 

"And just as it is appointed for men to die once, and after that

comes the judgement, so Christ, having been offered once to

bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal

with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for him."

                                                               ~   Hebrews 9:27-28

 

To speak of death to those staring it in the face?  And yet the minister continued, as if he could read Don's mind... God could easily answer all our prayers.  Prayers for healing, for remission of cancer, for wholeness in the flesh.  And if He did... why, no one would ever die!  For who doesn't pray for healing when they are sick?

 

I blinked at the logic.

 

And something clicked for Don.  A light shone bright.  After the worship service he was different, more content.  His focus had changed.  His faith found solid ground.

 

As Don worked thru the message that day, he admitted that he never really thought about how he would die, never expecting to suffer at such length.  Maybe, he said, I thought I would fall asleep one night, healthy and whole and wake up in heaven, completely skipping the "dying" part. 

 

Sometimes it's hard to accept that God's plan, His journey for us, will at some point take us through the death valley.  He will never turn a deaf ear to our cries and is there every step of the way... longing for our faith to be made whole and complete as we walk at last into eternity.  Complete and whole and more loved than we could ever imagine. 

 

"Now glory be to God, who by his mighty power at work

within us is able to do far more than we would ever dare to ask

or even dream of, infinitely beyond our highest prayers,

desires, thoughts, or hopes."

                                ~Ephesians 3:20

 

Later that afternoon, as we gathered together in a boisterous family circle, Don blessed the fellowship, the food, and encouraged our faith in the Grace of a Mighty God...

 

God delights in answering our prayers...if we only open our hearts and receive.

 

In Grace, Always,

               Jane

Why do you get married?

62 years...

...Married!!!

How do you make it work?  Some would ask Why do you make it work???

My beautiful parents-in-law, 62 years ago.

Time and marriage have a way of adding a few things...

Children and Growing Up

Daughter-in-laws and Opening Arms

Grandchildren and Laughter

Wrinkles out of nowhere

Pounds around the middle

Gray Hair on top

and No Hair for Pop :)

Love Multiplied

Heartaches Unavoidable...

And through it all, one thing remains constant.

The Two Shall be One...

Here on their 50th Wedding Anniversary,

and then Today, still together, going on 62 years Together!

Their marriage has survived miscarriage, military separations, moves, the death of a son, and now the advent of illness and the frailty of aging years...

The constancy of their marriage is like a welcoming light in the window beckoning you home.

It is a journey of faith and commitment and love.

From the first blush of young love to the cherished patina from decades of lived-out love ...

"We need a witness to our lives.  There's a billion people

on the planet...I mean, what does any one life really mean?

But in marriage, you're promising to care about everything.

The good things, the bad things, the terrible things,

the mundane things...all of it, all of the time, every day.

You're saying, 'Your life will not go unnoticed because

I will notice it.  Your life will not go un-witnessed

because I will be your witness'."

                       ~ Beverly Clark, Shall We Dance, 2004

For me, that is Legacy Living at it's finest.  To honor another with your heart, your words, your time, and your faithfulness.  It is leaving a Legacy that will outlast your life.  Their example has left indelible impressions upon each one of us as we too are witness to the enduring commitment of vows spoken some 62 years ago...

For Better, For Worse

In Sickness, In Health...

Marriage isn't for the faint of heart.  The commitment part takes discipline and time.  For isn't Perseverance simply a long obedience in the same direction?

The power of such a covenant is profound, and we are the joyful recipients of these sacred vows.  How blessed we are to be raised up and sheltered under the circle of their love...

Love you always Grandpa Don and Grandma Millie... This Daughter-in-law can't begin to express her love and gratitude for you both... How did I ever get so lucky?!

Graced Forever to be Grafted into your Story,  Always Yours, Jane 

Legacy Making

I love these old photographs.  Dad and I have been working on all those boxes from the attic!  And we have found precious pictures from the past.  I love, love these moments captured of mom and dad from their early years together.  The wedding, the babies (I'm the cute one in these pictures!)  These snippets of time frozen on film are the makings of a Family Legacy.

Mom left a beautiful Legacy for her family.  A life poured into the ones she loved.  And it gives me pause to think about the legacy that I'm leaving for my family.

Walking with mom through her Pancreatic Cancer Journey somehow distilled the priorites in my life. The small became inconsequential in the light of facing mom's last earthly days.  Leaving a Legacy.  I think about it alot.

What exactly is the Legacy I'm leaving behind for my family?  What will they remember?  What will they cherish?  What will they reject?  For whether I am doing things intentionally or unintentionally, my actions are leaving a path for the ones that follow. 

Legacy Making.  It's a deep subject.  Not sure I've really gotten it all ironed out, but there are a couple of things that lay heavy on my heart.  In the weeks to come I may be able to add to this list, for now it's a start. A way to intentionally lay a path for what's important in my life, to impress on the ones I love...

FAITH - It is the foundation for all that follows

FAMILY - Eternally connected, Make them a priority

SERVICE - People count, invest well

GRACE - At every turn, forgiveness, understanding and compassion

As I said, Legacy Making is a profound topic.  I am just beginning to scratch the surface of what it means. This I do know, our lives count to those around us.  Choosing to live out my faith, love my family, serve the comunity and give grace are some of the priorities I am challenging myself with.  

Intentionally Leaving a Legacy that will impart the things I value most to the ones I love best!

May this weekend be filled with all that's good and lead you down paths of Legacy Making of your own.  My Love, Jane  

What Lies Within...

"What lies behind us

and what lies before us

are tiny matters

compared to

what lies within us."

                                 

                                     ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Bug Has Been Named

Waiting is over. We have a name for the pesky bacteria that has set up housekeeping in mom's bloodstream.

Streptococcus Viridans.

Not a pleasant sort of bacteria. Dr. P, the infectious disease specialist, suspects that the bacteria has lodged in one of three places. The medi-port, the lungs, or the heart. And I have listed them in the order in which we hope to find them. Obviously, the medi-port would be best. It can be easily removed with surgery, terminating the source of the bacteria problem. The lungs are a little more tricky. She already has a hazy patch in the right lung and fluid in both. Recovery would be slow, but doable. The heart is another story. And this is where mom's background (cardiac care nursing), comes in handy, sort of. I almost wish I were blissfully ignorant of the full import of having the heart involved. If the strep has set up in her heart, it will damage the heart valves, leading to weakness, fatigue, fluid build-up, shortness of breath, etc., etc., a very slippery slope downhill. In a normal, healthy person, the only option if the valves are damaged would be open-heart surgery to replace the valves. With mom's ongoing battle with cancer, we're not sure if she would be a candidate for surgery. Ok, so do you now wish you were blissfully ignorant too? Sometimes, it's just TMI (too much information). But, you've read this far, keep going.

So, that's the word from Dr. P. As he listened to her heart and lungs, he asked if she had a cardiologist she would like to use. Without skipping a beat, she said Dr.McElroy. Dr. P paused and said he didn't know him, and didn't think he practiced out of this Texas Hospital. So, mom said okay, and asked for his recommendation. Dr. P said that Dr. Jane was very good, and we both agreed with a name like that, he's the one for mom! Anyway, about 30 seconds after Dr. P left, mom started chuckling. I haven't heard her laugh in the last 5 days and it startled me, but I asked her what was so funny. And she looked at me and said, Dr. McElroy practices in Peoria, Illinois...(their old hometown.)  Oh, the funny things that happen to our minds in the midst of stress! So glad she can laugh about it. That's the mom we know and love!

So, where do we go from here? Yesterday, they pulled another blood culture from the medi-port. We are waiting on results to rule it in or out as the source of the bacteria. Tomorrow she goes in for another chest x-ray to check on her lungs. In the meantime, they are continuing to give her lasix (a diuretic) to help reduce the fluid build-up in her lungs. And then, on Monday they will be doing an echocardiogram on her heart. This is an ultrasound picture of her heart and will tell us a lot - praying that it tells us all is well, no strep live here!

For now, we are in a holding pattern. Resting, going to the potty, snoozing, going to the potty (the lasix really works!), talking, napping, and going to the potty, oh, and eating too. I have to say that this hospital has an outstanding chef - kudos to the kitchen. Mom has eaten more here than I've seen her eat in a while!

Pray with us as we enter this second week in the hospital. Mom's energy is gone, but her spirit is spunky. We pray for healing, we pray for wisdom, we pray for strength to endure what lies before us.
As I left the hospital this afternoon, a song was playing on the radio. This is what I heard:

Be still, there is a healer
His love is deeper than the sea
His mercy, it is unfailing
His arms are a fortress for the weak

Let faith arise
Let faith arise

I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, You are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful, God, forever

 

So appropriate for me, for this moment. It's called "I lift my Hands" by Chris Tomlin. And it is a word for today. Be still. There is a healer.

Resting in Grace, Jane